MINDFULL - It won't be long now... Parallel Paths

[luvless]

This, right here, makes me want to hurl... I posted it in November of last year. SHEESH! Sure takes me a long as$ time to get it.

For the first time in a year, I initiated some kind of R talk... He had called me (after he left to go back out of town for work), and said I looked like I felt just horrible (bad cold recently, hospitalized for heart issues - ok now) and hoped I felt better. I txt'd him back and said...

"I just miss my husband. I miss our closeness. I miss feeling like a part of you. I miss our intimacy. I miss being loved by you. I just miss you,k even when you are right here. The real problem with my heart is that a piece of it is missing. I love you."

No response.

ICK !!!!!! that just really upsets me

[Virtually_Handsome]

(((((Mindfull)))))

[flowmom]

Mindfull, your strategy makes sense (biding your time to get the info that you need). It must be so hard continuing to live with him now that you're done. I can relate to the hurt that you must have been through for the past 2 years. It's been longer than that for me . I've been thinking about what Gnosis and Serenity have written about the LBS settling for crumbs...I'm proud of you for recognizing your own worth.

[kara]

(((Mind)))

My head is spinning. I was away for a couple of weeks on business and I

[kara]

Ooops, sorry. I was about to say that I am now catching up on sitches. You have been through a lot lately, sweetie. Still reading along but hope you are continuing to feel and be strong.

[mindfull]

Thank you, everyone.

I've had a particularly trying afternoon, and early evening. While I won't release prematurely on this situation, I also won't sit on this much longer. I, pretty much, wear my heart on my sleeve. I just plain don't act well.


I really need to focus this week on getting my homework done for the L. I got bombarded w/work last week, and couldn't get as much done as anticipated.

I need a peaceful home. My internal turmoil is too great.

Say some prayers.

[robx]

This, right here, makes me want to hurl... I posted it in November of last year. SHEESH! Sure takes me a long as$ time to get it.

For the first time in a year, I initiated some kind of R talk... He had called me (after he left to go back out of town for work), and said I looked like I felt just horrible (bad cold recently, hospitalized for heart issues - ok now) and hoped I felt better. I txt'd him back and said...

"I just miss my husband. I miss our closeness. I miss feeling like a part of you. I miss our intimacy. I miss being loved by you. I just miss you,k even when you are right here. The real problem with my heart is that a piece of it is missing. I love you."

No response.

ICK !!!!!! that just really upsets me

Yup, I went through that last year, you go through the things you have said, txt'd, emailed, etc and then read it again and say to yourself, "How could I have said these things, how stupid was I?"

But that's just being hard on yourself and you don't need to be, you were invested in this person for a long time and now that you're finally detaching and seeing the situation as it really is instead of with rose colored glasses on, reality is actually visible now and grounding you and you have a better idea of how to act in these situations.

You're doing good, standing up for yourself and realizing your self-worth is tough when you haven't done it for what seems like forever, for what it's worth you're doing awesome, keep up the good work lady!

[newmama]

You are in my prayers. Can you take a day off from work to tackle the stuff you need for the L? (((Mindfull)))

[rockedworld]

But that's just being hard on yourself and you don't need to be, you were invested in this person for a long time and now that you're finally detaching and seeing the situation as it really is instead of with rose colored glasses on, reality is actually visible now and grounding you and you have a better idea of how to act in these situations.

You're doing good, standing up for yourself and realizing your self-worth is tough when you haven't done it for what seems like forever, for what it's worth you're doing awesome, keep up the good work lady!

^^^^ what Rob said ^^^^^

(((Mind))) I am so sorry you've had a rough day. We are here for you. You will get done what you need to do and you will take care of yourself. You do need inner peace and peace in your home... and you are on your way to accomplishing that. Don't lose sight of your goals and of all that you have gained and learned. The person who is posting today is a far cry from the person who posted that last November. Don't lose sight of that.

[flowmom]

I also hope that you can take some time off work. It seems like things are really piling on right now. The sooner you get the L stuff done, the sooner you can take action and it sounds like you're...done.

hugs!