Not happy. NOT NOT happy. Just came home from weekend and H hasn't been home since yesterday at 2 pm. Didn't show up to pick up DSS20 from work. I peed and pooped the dogs, DSS16 (who is very lazy and irresponsible) was left home alone all this time and did feed and pee the dogs earlier, but basically left them in their kennels all weekend so he didn't have to "deal" with them. There's poop in the kennels, which means they were not taken out, and there's poop in my bedroom. These dogs are HOUSE TRAINED. For them to poop in the house, that means they were NEGLECTED the entire weekend.
I left at 6 am on Saturday morning. I fed, peed and pooped the dogs, and left them in their kennels to go back and take naps until H got up later that morning. If there was poop in my bedroom, that means H put them in there to keep from having to be bothered by them.
He's basically acting like DSS16 - immature, irresponsible and LAZY.
To not take care of the needs of the dogs, I am just furious. He blew off his kids, didn't tell them (again) where he'd be, how he could be reached (no cell phone) and how to get a hold of him in an emergency. Not to mention not telling them they'd have to cook for themselves... not that they're not old enough to figure that out, but it would have been nice to make sure they knew to take something out of the freezer and put it in the slow cooker or something similar.
DSD spoke to me for the hour ride home from my mom's house about how she's concerned. Dad keeps disappearing to go hang out with friends he had in high school, drinking and driving, out all night, never knowing where he is, he's acting like a nut when they're around (playing with them, over the top playing, trying to make them laugh and play back - like one of their peers rather than their dad), and Friday totally blew up at her twin - yelled like I've never seen before, called him a cry baby, ridiculed him (he wasn't doing what he was supposed to be doing - he was supposed to go to boy scouts on a camp out and has some emotional problems, he wouldn't get out of the car and H blew up, yelled, hit my door - dented my car speaker - threw a baby hissy fit and called DSS a baby also. NEVER seen him act like this) She suspects OW but I haven't told her yet. It's not her I'm worried about, it's her telling the boys and they would have identity issues with it. I still have to feel them out about it. She said that Dad is basically acting younger than they are and she said sometimes it seems like he's a 4 year old and sometimes their age, 15. She is worried b/c he never tells them anything and when she asks where he's been he yells at her saying things like "oh, now my daughter is giving me the third degree." He also ridicules her, which he's never done before. He's always been very sensitive to his kids.
He has some issues with them because he met their mother when he was 23, she was 18 and they only knew each other a few weeks when she got pregnant and he married her. Then he asked for a divorce 4 years later but she went off of birth control and onto fertility meds and wound up with twins. He stayed another 4 years. He loves his kids, but also feels like they are the reason he never got to be on his own, never got to become the man he would have... so there's some resentment there also. He's always been more of a friend than a dad, but lately he's taking it to the extreme and not allowing for ANY responsibility on his part. He is not a dad at all, he's totally their friend. The first time I've seen him try to parent since this whole thing began was him throwing a complete hissy fit on DSS on Friday.
