I am not saying what your pastor did is what I would have done. That being said, you also don't know what your XH was telling him. Perhaps he fed lies to your pastor and your pastor wasn't sure who to believe
while the truth always seems so obvious to us, to outsiders it is not so as our Xs are master manipulators and don't often admit to being the schmeels they really are
perhaps this pastor was trying to remain nuetral and the fact that you wanted him to take your side made it difficult for him to reach out to you????
again...not saying he was right and I probably would have kicked him in the ass without even hearing his side, which may be why I am not a pastoral minister!!!
