People keep saying "You can't control" all teh time here.. this is counter to MWD's teaching... MWD makes a very strong point for being able to change people for the better.
She uses the example of being able to turn her H from calm and casual to furuious in a matter of moments...
Her argument is that if you can change a person for the negative, you can change them for the positive too... you just need to find the right approaches...
You can't control the wind no, but you can adjust your sails...
Saying "you can't control" to me just sounds like hopelessness being handed out on a plate... its not helpful I don't think.
I think you get that too Pass... that you can influence his behaviuor based on YOUR choices, I think that's why you are such an avid poster and analyze things so much, you DO get how much of an impact you can make if you make good choices.
