Your h sounds like he's had a lot on his plate and the only way to cope is to run and find something to alleviate his pain and distraction. Unfortuantely, he's not turning to you or the children. I'm sorry for what he's done and continues to do.
Yes, I guess he does miss you and the family. You all were his whipping girls/boys for such a long time. He took out his frustrations about life and what he was doing w/his life on all of you and that's not the way to cope w/such things. He has no one right now to vent to. The ow isn't going to listen to his garbage and take it the way that you did.
If would continue to be very dim w/him. You do not need to be available all of the time to him. If you feel that you are doing better w/o contact, by all means continue it. I would suggest that they only time you initiate contact would be about your children and financials. He's got to grow up and the only way to do that is to let him do it on his own.
Again, I've very sorry you are here.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
