So what was it that you did that turned H around in the way he treats S? I have this problem too... I also understand caving to the demands of Mr. Control Freak. ONly you can decide if it's more important now to be setting and following through on firm boundaries (my vote) in terms of respecting if you and S already have plans for church. Its' the more painful route but read Kim's blog again. She had to take complete control and set all the boundaries. And your H needs to respect you more including your plans with or for S.
Now if you feel that him spending bonding time is more important, let it go. Vent here, whatever you need to do to discharge your feelings, but let them have the time.
HOwever it sounds like he's like my H where he feels he can go around and do what he wants with no consideration for you and in a hypocritical way and I think it's important you stick to your boundaries.
Otherwise, it's like he's kind of bullying you - you don't want to say anything because he's in a nice phase and you want to keep it that way. But he should be nice all the time and not be rewarded just because he's not being a complete abusive jerk.
