In reality, the image of my M was really just that, an image made up in my mind. I never really had it, because she never really gave it to me. I lived a lie as much as she did. Only difference is that I would have fought to keep it and make it better.
What do you mean by this? I think this is how I am feeling too..but I am not sure if I am feeling this way because of his A..and all of this other sh*t that came along with it. My H spent so much time in the past couple of months telling me all that was wrong with me and our M..I am not sure what is real anymore. I am starting to doubt that I ever really loved him. It is an awful feeling.
Is anyone ever 100% happy in their M? When I talk to my friends...there are always issues. Everyone always wishes they had more of this or more of that. We envy qualities in eachother's spouses that our spouse doesn't have...qualities in other people's M that our M didn't have. Is it just the "grass is greener" syndrome? ...or was my marriage just a sham?
I am starting to doubt the whole M thing. My MIL was telling me the other night about two of her sisters that had affairs..and their husbands. Her BIL had an affair. Her best friend's H had an affair...then the best friend had a 10 year affair with the handyman. You read so many articles.."I don't love my spouse".."I don't find my spouse attractive"...etc etc
