still separated, in limbo, still hopeful

[flowmom]

Newmama, your fears ARE legitimate. Sorry if I seemed like I was dismissing them. No matter how much I accept and detach, I don't think I'll ever be at peace with what divorce means for my children. But no matter how much I want my children to grow up in an intact family, that's not something I can make happen for my children. Only if H has a change of heart and a sudden willingness and ability to shift would it be possible. "Intact family" is therefore out of my control at this point. I have to find a way of forgiving myself for this happening to my children. And it will involve many hours in IC to get there I'm sure.