still separated, in limbo, still hopeful

[gatsby11]

Newmama, I'm proud of you. I'm glad you went out the other day (the McDonald's day) and that you're so open with your fears.

I didn't read all of your pages. . . just the first few of the previous thread and then the last few and then the first few of this one and the last few. We do have some striking similarities. (I got pregnant immediately, as well!)

I hope you don't mind, but I want to respond to your thoughts/fears.

First, your son will be okay whether he's in split custody or primary with you. I really don't like the idea in my situation, either, but I've really come to believe that she will be okay if I show her it's okay for her. (Talking about my daughter, that is.) I'm so glad that my girl is going to be strong like her mom. Not weak like her dad. (Yup, I said it!)

What is worse is if in the split custody, you have to deal with your WH's OW and their life. And I guess you do by the nature of the setup. So that is the bummer of shared custody, I think.

Now for the fear of being torn- ah! Yeah, that could happen. I know, I don't like that idea either. Ok, so I don't have any thoughts on this one except AGREED! (But I should be honest-- I wish I get put in that situation, but I'd be happy with just another man, too. :))

And last, you will always love him. But that's OK, it will fade. . .

Hopefully things turn around, though, of course.

I did read waaay back in your early posts that you said you were going to be done trying Jan 1. (It stuck with me because I've thought a similar thing!) What made you change your mind? Or did you stop trying? Since I didn't read all the posts, I may have missed something.

Ok, bye!