I don't know how to tell OW's H not to call me anymore. I don't want to be rude. But I'll figure it out and gently suggest that it may not be such a good idea.
How about.
"Stop calling me."
As for the not being rude?
Are you playing on being social with them in the future?
Soup...
you know...when I am sick, I actually prefer the old fashioned campbells chicken noddle soup from a can. Reminds me of how mom used to open it.
Homemade soup is great and lovingly crafted...but give me the canned soup when I am sick.
Just a suggestion, and WHY not bring it over to him. However, do not surprise him, give him a few minutes warning before you show up...
damn now I want some soup.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
Oh, tricky one!! He asked you let him be so he can get his cold medicine and rest, so by that rationale you should leave him be. On the other hand, chicken soup is a really nice treat when one is down. How about a compromise -- leave him be today, but offer to bring some soup tomorrow?!! That way you don't sound like you're coming on too strong, but still get to do something sweet!
H called to find out how to make nachos. Apparently that's what D wanted him to make when they come over tonight. Gave him some ideas...Off he went shopping for ingredients. Called me from the store to ask what kind of chips should he get "there are so many choices" and what kind of salsa...just like the "old" husband used to do...kind of funny...
Said that he's not feeling well, but didn't want to cancel daughter's visit. I told him that I made chicken soup, should I send him some with D. Said "Yes please, that would be nice". And that's what I did
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
TF & SW - Thanks for the thumbs up. I even got a "thank you for the soup" call.
I'm a little frustrated. Since the day he announced that the affair is over and he wants to try to R, we didn't really talk about our relationship or any concrete plans as to what the next step is. I'm not initiating any R discussions and either is he. The day when he told me he wants to R we did talk and I told him that I want to take it slow, but I was expecting him to peruse me more...wanting to spend more time together.
He was doing acts of service for me especially when I was sick. Now he calls several times a day mainly about business or when he needs something. Not just to chat. So far he didn't go out of his way to ask me to spend any fun time with him.
I know that last week I was sick and this week he is sick...maybe that plays a role.
Also he is still very much depressed (end of affair/MLC???). I hear it in his voice on the phone, there is no enthusiasm or happiness showing. He is even short on the phone sometimes. What I say and do seems to be occasionally irritating to him. I feel that I still need to validate a lot and tip toe around him...not always, but sometimes (and I'm sick and tired of that)
But overall there are positives, I have to remind myself that it's only been 10 days. I should just relax and let it develop.
I'm not waiting for him to plan my weekend. Tomorrow I'm going out with a bunch of my friends...dinner & maybe dancing. Should be fun
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
