W still wants separation, need to DB more

[OfficerInNeed]

My W and I had dentist appointments today. I asked her to drive. In the past when she would drive I would be overly critical of her driving so she never liked to drive. Just last week she brought that fact up. So I asked her to drive and I just sat there relaxed having casual conversation with her.

We did quite a few things together today so I will just provide a summary of events


- W still cold toward me. As I have mentioned all along and from what I am coming to understand is my W is no longer my W. She was never like this toward me but at the same time I was like this to her for so long. When I say "cold" she responds to questions or comments with a noise like "hmm" rather than words, she does not look at me and some times she raises her eyebrows like she is being sarcastic. It's like when she tells me something or does something she wants my full attention which I give her but it is not reciprocal.

- It was raining out and I had to run in the store my wife stayed in the car, when I walked out she leaned over and opened the door for me.

- We were in the mall just walking around. Went into a store my W was look at purses, I kind of drifted away from her to the mens section and she walked over to me. When she came over she said "I found a purse I liked" and I said "Really, lets go check it out" and then she said "Did you find anything"

* As a side note, before our sitch when we would go places, we would be at hip of each other. My W has broken this routine, she walks her own way leaving me to follow, so in some instances I decide not to follow and do my own thing but then when she asks a question or tells me something and I am not there she gets upset because she was either talking to herself or has to repeat.

I am trying to acknowledge positives as baby steps so I can stay motivated. I think "If she is trying to co-exist with me and counting down the days why would she be generous, considerate or even care what I think about things? why would I even matter to her anymore?" or am I just reaching for positives?