HELP!!! H and I communicated to discuss some insurance issues yesterday and he was very nice and asked how i was feeling, etc. and in conversation said i care for you very much, I would do anything for you. WHAT!!!!
throughout the day there were some texts back and forth, nothing with anger actually more pleasant. in the efforts of trying to state my ground... again... i sent a text saying i cant be friends... my heart doesnt know how to stop feeling what it feels! he then replied back several time with ok. then why not, then i dont understand whey we cant be and then... LAst night I get a text, Can i stop by to feel the baby kick if you are home! so he came over and we chatted and hung out for an hour and a half!
WHAT IS THAT!!!! Was i wrong for saying yes? needless to say baby did not move once while he was around! but he was caring, did a few things around the house that involved heavy lifting, without me asking. he touched my belly so many times and talked to the baby. rolled around on the floor with the dog. we talked we laughed... moments with a few tears. we looked at the baby gifts and clothes i accumulated and laughed. he looked so happy. we got along so great... a few times i said well baby is not moving, you can go home i guess... and he would say no thats ok. and he was content being there with me. it was so nice... when he got home (we live 3 minutes apart) he sent me a text saying thanks for letting me come over, i know it can be hard on you? and then going into asking is the baby moving now? knew i shouldnt have left, etc.
So which is it? Is he starting to have thoughts and wants to see what life could be like if he wiggles his way back and work on our M? or is it him wanting to be friends... or just claim his role in the baby's life as a D. i am very honest about letting him know i cant be with him any other way than his W, and being friends is not an option. is he just mega confused and doesnt know what he wants either?!?!?!??
was thinking of sending him an email and saying i was happy to see you last night. I am not sure it was the right thing as you know how i feel about you. and i clearly can not be friends with you. if you are confused or dont know what you are feeling i wish you would say so. if you have a 1% feeling that you would like to try then i would risk it all, and start by being friends, but if not i dont think its going to work for me that we hang out as friends (said he wants to stop back another night)
HELP!!! I am telling myself to have LOW EXPECTATIONS and JUST BE. I am trying to be upbeat and positive and even put some lipgloss on last night and was smiling and charming last night and spruced up a bit, didnt want H to find me looking shleppy!
