I know the OW is dysfunctional, I think that might be part of her appeal. I have been thinking about the cause of my husbands MLC, his mother growing up had some mental condition that no one ever talks about. My husband mentioned a few things, he would come home from school, she would lock the doors and call the police claiming he was trying to break in, would say he was not her child. Obviously all very damaging to a young psyche. I think on some level he thinks if he can fix OW, then he is fixing his mother.
Might be pure conjecture on my part, but that is the time frame I see when he runs away into the past. He has started to listen to music from the late 70's, early 80's which would be his childhood years. Sometimes I see tears in his eyes.
In the early days of husbands MLC, before I found DB, I did snoop more, mostly to confirm what I suspected was an affair. I have seen pictures of OW - you are right, she is not at all like me. Mostly in the way that she really really seems to need attention. Perhaps that is a stereotype on my part, but she is overly made up, obviously saloned hair, long painted fingernails, over the top jewelry, lots of cleavage, what I would consider trashy type outfits. I flatter myself that people have said I look like Grace Kelly (my husband used to say that alot, when he still admired me) so we are definitely a different type.
I need attention too, but I'm not needy. Perhaps that is part of the problem.
Me - 38 Husband - 40 MLC! Together 12 years Married 11 years Still the love of my life Forever only lasted 10 years before his MLC and affair
