You've intrigued me here. Would you elaborate more on your thinking here? I'm interested in hearing what you think about this.
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I was trying to suggest that perhaps, but not for sure, if he could see the actual in and out of all money, he might be able to see your full financial picture. I'm guessing only when I suggest that seeing his contribution and discussing it as important while insufficient may do the following: - remind him that he lives a better life thanks to your abilities - remind him that having a free house is saving a lot of money - show him that his income does pay some bills and that it is valued - make him feel safe that you aren't 'hording' away money to leave him or restrict your way of life to control (or whatever fear he may have)
I understand now. Thank you for clarifying. I don't think he's been able to see a full financial picture, so your thoughts are very valid.
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On a different note, reading through your thoughts, I have been impressed by how many things you have attempted - a true overachiever!
Uh oh! To what do you refer here?
And yes, I'm definitely an overachiever. You have me pegged!
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I can see why you're baffled somewhat by his stance. As I've read and read, I've noticed that there were many emotional needs I just didn't meet. Not on purpose, but I just didn't do them. The same holds true for my W. Over then next week or two, or months, keep looking for those needs of yours and his. Try to meet them, even in his absence. When you are ready to date, you'll be able to show him that awesome new (but still changing & growing) future for you both.
I think there were some needs he and I both didn't meet for each other, but I didn't realize it as it was happening.
It's good advice to try to meet his and my needs even though he is not here. I have a tendency to ignore what I need. I overwork and overdo, and I demand too much of myself. I do not demand too much of others, but I'm extremely hard on myself.
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I can get the fear with dating, but isn't wondering a worse fear? If you ask him for something small and he reects, you at least know where he's at now. Right now, you don't know much. Why not try it?
Wondering is bad. I don't like wondering, not knowing, and being in constant limbo. I should try it. I'll think on my plan of action or how I can start small.
