Time for darkness.... (thread number 3)ears open

[james217]

I mentioned this earlier.



1 Corinthians 7

1Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman.

2Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband.

3Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.

4The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.

5Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.

6But I speak this by permission, and not of commandment.

7For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that.

8I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, it is good for them if they abide even as I.

9But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.

10And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband:

11But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.

12But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away.


so if my wife has asked for forgiveness and she has needs that need to be appease and I refuse guess what? I'm still sinning.

in·con·ti·nent   /ɪnˈkɒntnənt/ Show Spelled[in-kon-tn-uhnt] Show IPA
–adjective

2.unable to contain or retain (usually fol. by of): incontinent of temper.
3.lacking in moderation or self-control, esp. of sexual desire.
4.unceasing or unrestrained: an incontinent flow of talk.

verse 5 talks about belonging to one another fulfilling each others needs so that the adultery and temptation and fornication will not occur on either side.

So yes she was unfaithful but she wasn't doing that type of stuff before. Obviously I was not fulfilling her needs. Whether it was physical, mental, emotional, financial, or physical.

I may have thought I was but I was not if this occured in the first place.

There is more responsiblity placed on the man than the woman. The woman is the "weaker vessel." It says that in Peter.

We have both agreed that the seperation is the best thing right now. She brought up coming home this past MOnday. I immediately said not right now.

This is why I don't understand how going dark helps my situation. We were studying our bible together. Trying to sort out issues addressing the things we both did wrong to get us into this spot and then backing off and giving the other time and space to think about things. Whether it was for a few hours a nights rest, etc etc.

the more we talked the more things were coming out that I didnt know were a problem. Or more issues and concerns she had.

but if the vets say to go dark? hey i'm just a rookie with a bible and a family full of preachers deacons andelders what do I know? *stays dark*

Not to discourage you James217,

But it seems like your current environment will never allow things to be right ( as long as your wife listens ). Fight that portion first.

sometimes the best way to fight is to not to fight. The way I'm going to fight that is by making things being stated a lie.

Finding a job and getting my own place and taking care of myslef and the boys is a start. Dealing with my temper and health issues is a start.

If all the evidence stacked against me is factual then why would she not listen or even be thinking about it in the back of her mind?

It should not take her not talking to these people or us being away in order to have a successful M.

The devil can take any shape form or fashion to try to destroy marriages. The key is to stay in the word pray without ceasing (1st thessalonians 5:17) and keep his commandments.

i've been fasting and praying for over a month now. The only time I break fast is when I feel like my blood sugar is too low and I need to eat something. I usually fast until sunset. Then I eat once a day.

I do drink plenty of water though.