GF MLC is one of the most difficult things you will go through. You are doing very well even if some days you don't think so. It takes time to feel whole again. Just keep on moving forward one step at a time. It is time for you to stand on your own. You can do this and you will be so happy and proud of your accomplishments.
To answer your question. My h and I did not reconcile and I was a lot like you. I had never been on my own but I like my life better now and I look forward to more great things in my life. I am sad for my children but they are doing very well because I stayed sane and put them first in my life. I also surrounded them with people who love them.
