You mention wanting a "respectful friendship" and I wonder whether that really is what you want or is it reconciliation you're after.
That's my dilemma. I feel stronger, more detached when we aren't talking or are just being short or snippy with each other.
When we have good times together, like the phone call in September or at Christmas, my heart starts bursting with hope because, yes, I do really want reconciliation. As I said to her in September and October, I understand why we separated. Things were not getting better, but I don't understand why we never even considered giving me a second chance.
I need to be able to be like I was today with her all the time without getting my hopes up for a reconciliation. But to date I haven't been able to.
Does that make sense (incidentally, that's a favorite phrase of STBXW)?
Me: 47, Ds 17-13, D final 6-11 http://tinyurl.com/yk4e2tz http://tiny.cc/thread2 http://tinyurl.com/ydtphqu http://tinyurl.com/thread4 http://tinyurl.com/3sm78k6 http://tinyurl.com/thread6
