I read the beginning of your thread. Sounds alot like what I went through. My W was on Zoloft and took herself off her medication - not good. I have a SS who's alot older than my D. My mom had a stroke and was bed ridden until she died. Followed by my dad who I didn't know very well passing away. Now you have a brief view of my history here's what I think.
I don't think you helped your H when he was on the ADs. All of a sudden he was nicer and easier to take advantage of. I don't this was done intentionally; it's just human nature. Unfortunately, inside H's head was a ticking time bomb. He was doing things he felt wasn't really his nature. Almost an imposter if you want to think of it that way. Then when he took himself off the ADs, all hell broke loose. The chemical imbalance threw his mood off and he "brained washed himself" turning what you thought was good into one of many things. Maybe he thought you were controlling or taking advantage of him or one of many other things he could dream up.
I'm not trying to put the blame on you. I'm telling you with as much honesty as I can this is what I've done to my W. The MLC may have brought on the depression but I (we) don't know how much harm we caused.
From my experience I can tell you to not plead. Find a very tiny thing in common and do it with him. Don't let H know you're only doing it for him. Let him think all your improvements are for you and no one else.
Again I'm sorry if I hurt you in any way. I've been know to say my piece before getting all the facts. If you like to discuss or give me a piece of your mind - please come by my thread.
