My husband is addicted to an emotional affair

[TrentC]

I honestly do think she has no clue what my h is doing. I think she has no clue we are still in contact and that just because my h is living at his moms doesn't mean we are not married.

Ruined is right. You have far more to lose by contacting her than you stand to gain.

And if he's not being honest with her, why on Earth would you tell her that? This just means that "relationship" is even more doomed to failure. This is what you want!