Thanks greatly for your response - I have brought up similar analogies with her and the response is along the lines that sex is not a necessity for a relationship but the essence of a relationship is communication. Several of her friends have a good marriage and they don't have a sex life as both partners have little interest I should be happy that we otherwise have a good marrige and I should merely take care of myself if I really and truly have a need for sex. She is happy to have physical contact in the form of holding hands and hugging - why is there a need for anything more? We usually end up fighting at this point and nothing constructive gets resolved.
I would like to be constructive, put away all of the feelings of guilt and hurt and positively deal with the situation without trying to antagonize each other. Seems that either I will have to entirely give up on intimate contact with her (the propsect of which is really depressing) or she will have to try to become more sexually inclined (which she believes is unlikely because she has tried this approach many times). I'm not meaning to whine, but I can't seem to come up with a different analysis at this point.
