OK 4luv, it sounds like you are getting your senses back. I was afraid I was giong to have to resort to posting some of your past rants against your huband ... there are so many on here ...
June's got the idea 100% no contact, treat your H as if he's dead. Same with his son... he cna't show up in and out whenever he pleases. He can't just play DAD when the mood strikes him... he makes the commitment or not.
As far as therapy.
1. Tell your H he has to SHARE the SAME FT as YOU... I REALLY do NOT reccomend you two have two different FT's. That's not gonig to be very effecive. A FT works like a referee during a boxing match... if you have TWO REFEREES things get VERY CONFUSING... not to mention the FT's wont likley even COMMUNICATE...
I know your H is not local... well, that's a problem he's going to have to solve. Either he travels to the appointment, works with the FT over the phone, or moves closer.. its HIS PROBLEM. You set your hoop and leave it for him to jump or balk at.
2. No contact, no emails, no phone, no damn texting.
3. If you can't steel yourself when in real time with him, if he HAS to say something, email is the ONLY way you will hear him. And tell him your father is monitoring every email he sends.
Basically get him the professional help he needs, and then treat him as if he is dead.
if in six months your FT tells you there's some improvement and worth listening to him.. that's great. (Another reason for him to attend the same one as you.. just on different days to be safe)
