I agree with Gucci and Sandi. In this instance YOU pursued too much. My wife has taken me up on a few of the things I've asked her to do, dinner etc, but has also turned me down on a couple of things as well. When she turns me down on ONE thing, I do not ask for ANYTHING else at that time. I finish the conversation friendly and leave. I also make sure that I am not the only one doing the inviting. A recent dinner was her idea, not mine.
It is worth noting that as my C and I discuss things, we are thinking that my W may be in more of a MLC situation. She is not just questioning our relationship, but also things she has wanted to do (think bucket list) that she has not done.
My W also has some similarities with Sandi in that she has shown some desire to be alone. I don't know how accurate they are, but most stats I've seen say women are twice as likely as men to experience depression at different stages of life. My W's actions seem to follow this.
The message I would have for you, mza8, is cut way down on the pursuing. I know it gets a little exciting when your W "shows signs", just don't go overboard. If your wife says no when you ask her to do something, I would not ask her to do anything else right then.
In my particular sitch, my W and I are having R talks. My C has encouraged me to do this as SHE brings it up. We talked quite a while one day. Since it seems that MLC (and probably WAW) has some depression attached to it, when she talked about what she wanted to do as she said "because life is so short" (MLC hint), I asked her lots of questions about things we have not done yet. She was very engaged with me in this talk and showed some excitement on her part.
Continue to be patient with her, and certainly take care of yourself.
