VETERANS VIEWS ON WALKING AWAY.

[gr8 day 2B alive]

Ruined, thanks for the reply and for sharing your post.

I have reached the turning point and I have decided I will no longer be in limbo. I am going to start doing things for ME now and I don't care what W thinks. We only get one life and time sure goes fast.
I deserve to be treated better and I am not going to stand in idle waiting for it to happen.

I am going to contact a realtor and start looking forward in my life. I am also going to contact W and set this meeting up to discuss our assets and custody. I need to to this for me.

This is what I want! If she doesn't like it then she is going to thinking.

It's not that I don't love H or want my M to end, it was the realization that I love me more. Seems a much more psychologically healthy place to be. H has made it clear through word and deed that he doesn't want me. H painted me into a corner; there's only one choice, and that is move on

Right on the money here. I haven't recieved one ounce of evidence that she wants anything different. She is just prolonging this for whatever her reason is and it's now my turn to take control!

I'm glad to see people enjoy this thread. Britts post woke me up.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

Atta boy!

Remember, DON'T be a dikk -- just upbeat and confident. "I have decided that" is always a great prefacing phrase.

Puppy

[gr8 day 2B alive]

Thanks for the encouragement Puppy.

W is going away for 4 days with D friend who is a bad influence. I'll let her enjoy her time then drop my own bomb.

I AM going to use this:

Remember, DON'T be a dikk -- just upbeat and confident. "I have decided that" is always a great prefacing phrase

[OfficerInNeed]

Do you think it is time I try this giving my sitch or is it too soon for such action?

http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubbthreads.php?ubb=showflat&Number=1980070&page=1

We still live together. Still have good times together (W calls it co-existing).

When I spoke to my DB coach I was told to act as if my W was my sister. Show care and generosity but NO R/M talks or talks about feelings (which I have been doing pretty much up till that call besides a few backslides.)

[Surviving03]

ok guys... i did it... i told H in an IM today while at work that I have decided that D is for the best, it is never going to work between us...... He didnt reply to that... hope he got it! It was time to leave work and after waiting like 10 minutes for a response I left... anyways... feeling good... feeling in control of myself.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

Thanks for the encouragement Puppy.

W is going away for 4 days with D friend who is a bad influence. I'll let her enjoy her time then drop my own bomb.

Do you -- or will you -- have an intel on this trip? Might give you a good final boost of confidence if you end up needing it, if she's not a good girl.

Puppy

[gr8 day 2B alive]

Unfortunately have have no intel on this trip. The only thing I will have is me reading her actions and mood when I see her next week.

If she can't look me in the eye when she sees me then I know she is guilty of something.

Any other advice moving forward?

[Puppy Dog Tails]

Yeah, get some good intel, lol. The landscape is littered with wayward spouses looking you right in the eye and lying.

Doesn't really matter at this point, I guess, b/c you do sound resolved just past on the crap treatment that you've been getting. I can't guarantee that this will work, but I do think it's your BEST chance you've got, and you really have nothing to lose, since the current way isn't working either.

Puppy

[gr8 day 2B alive]

I can't guarantee that this will work, but I do think it's your BEST chance you've got, and you really have nothing to lose, since the current way isn't working either

My thinking excatly. Why am I going down cheeseless tunnels.
If it isn't working, try something else.

Wow I have learned a few things! lol

[gr8 day 2B alive]

Officer,
I am not sure if you're asking me if I think you should pull the trigger(no pun intended) I haven't followed your post too much.

Since I don't have a OM in the picture(or at least I don't think I do) I don't think I could offer you much advice.

From your sign on date it looks like you have been here only 2 months which I feel is not enough time for a drastic move. But everyone is different. Keep taking your DB coach's advice for now and don't do your W dirty work.