Is the forgivness for you or for her? Answer this one please.
For her, it is me forgiving her. But also me not dwelling on the fact that she has done what she has done. It is me letting go of something that I could turn into a huge ball of hate.
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I want to be WHOLE AGAIN. Does WHOLE AGAIN have to include another person? Have you thought about becoming whole again AND then trying to work on your M.
No, not until now.
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IMO no one knows how to detach. You learn this thru trial and error. Read the link on detachment that OP provided. Read it several times. Allow it to reallly sink in. The detaching has been the hardest thing in this process for me but the most helpful. You see once you let go and detach you can begin to really heal and grow. Why? Because you are no longer allowing your emotions to be driven by her actions or lack of actions. You see you really begin to accept that you have no control over her. It is hard buddy but based on your post I am sure that you can do it.
I'm learning this as each day goes by. My IC says that I'm doing fine. And as you said yesterday I just need to cut myself some slack. I've put 100% of myself into the DBing thing and I'm expecting results right away. I really just need to remind myself that I'm going to make mistakes no matter what. That even though the wisest of the wisest could give me the best advice and I could follow it to a T and still screw up. There really is no correct way to do this and that is what I have to realize. DBing is about saving ourselves ultimately and that should be my goal.
Thanks for everything Eric, dday, OTMT
I'll be taking a little bit of a break from here. I just need to regroup and rest. I'm exhausted because I've really only done this for the past 3 months. I have had no focus for anything else.
Aces....
I like all this empty space because i can now type out things that are important.
Like: D7 S2 starting swimming lessons on 3/30
"Readily will I display the intestinal fortidue required to fight on..."
