Thank you all for your exceptional advice. FM, I have not been focusing at all on thought-stopping when it comes to my H. I am actually thinking of him more than ever. He leaves for deployment in 2 and 1/2 weeks. So I guess desparation in settling in. I KNOW that I NEED to focus on me ABSOLUTELY and leave my H to God and to give him the space he needs.
He has indicated through text messages and emails recently over the last few days that he is (1) very confused, (2) not happy spending time with others, and (3) that he has missed me "on occasion".
Well I expected something to happen from this and spent the weekend in a hole. I KNOW - NOT GOOD!. He has been emailing a lot over the last few days and this morning his message about how he is spending his time - with "friends" from work and that while he is not wearing his wedding ring, he pulls it out occasionally.
I "spun out of control" this past weekend and need to learn how to get more of a grip. The GALing is not been consistent and sometimes I just don't feel like doing anything.
The H cancelled the 2 court summons he filed. Now I am waiting for the LS to drop on me. I think I also need to find a new L, because I am doing my own research and asking questions, but it doesn't appear that the advice acknowledges my research or even lends an ear to at least assessing how any of my input could be used.
I guess I am feeling defeated, I am tired, and feel that my H will never return or be willing to try again.
What a day....
OLD THREAD-http://tinyurl.com/y98nuty Me 44 H 51 T 15 yrs M 9+ yrs No Kids "You may be deceived if you trust too much, but you will live in torment unless you trust enough."
