Calling all affair annihilators & boundary setters

[Puppy Dog Tails]

Absolutely agree.

In general, I'm only in favor of snooping when:

- you’re initially trying to confirm an affair;

- as a gathering of evidence for a "cause" legal action of adultery, or to help you make a decision about custody;

- to confirm no-contact, as part of a MUTUALLY-AGREED-UPON transparency plan;

- you are concerned about dissipation of marital assets, or a drug, gambling or alcohol addition, or some other behavior that might prove harmful to the family.

I don't see any of those applying right now in your sitch, Courts.

Puppy

[courts0818]

I just got home from the grocery store and I'm so glad to see the posts. I needed that today! I will go back and answer your quetions. But I have a quick question. My friend and I have been talking and just decided to take our girls to Disney World next month. We need to book everything now before the prices go up. Should I just book it and do it, without checking with H? If it were just me going, I'd book and go with it. But since I'm taking DD, should I let him know now?

[gman]

your call...maybe just tell him, you two are going and when...i wouldn't invite him per say...if he asks to join you, what would you want? (notice i didn't say "say" - what would you want courts?)

[Puppy Dog Tails]

I would just inform him that you two are going, "as a courtesy."

Puppy

[courts0818]

I'm not inviting him. He has a new job and I don't think he could take time off. We are making it a girl's only trip. Like PDT said I would be letting him know as a courtesy.

[gman]

well it sounds like you have your answer - now book it before it goes up!

[courts0818]

I texted H just to let him know. I had this feeling that I really should tell him as a courtesy - that it was the right thing to do. So he texts back,
"Well thank you. Guess I'm not invited."

Now how am I supposed to reply to that?

[gman]

oh come on courts... you know the answer.

you don't have to reply right now.

[courts0818]

I know...it's just the point. It's like he plays mind games with me. This is why I really do need a vacation.

[Puppy Dog Tails]

I know...it's just the point. It's like he plays mind games with me. This is why I really do need a vacation.

It takes two to play a game. Refuse to play.

Puppy