Been a while, but now that I'm going through a divorce I thought I would start posting a bit again. It's been a wild ride and now that I'm stepping off I'm seeing things very differently than I did before. The ride ended, when the mc and the pastor both told me she was done. She spoke to the mc and the mc told me that she has moved me into the role (in her mind) of FIF (formerly intimate friend). The W subsequently asked me for separation/divorce and we're putting the house on the market as of tomorrow.
I look back and don't regret what I've done to try and save my marriage. I do realize that I tried to change me when all along the problem wasn't with me. The mc tried to tell me that, but I wasn't willing to listen. Everyone told me really good advice (except for the 'have an affair' advice, but that was me - I didn't do it though %-) ).
It really came down to I wasn't willing to admit what was happening, but essentially she never came back from the nephew's funeral.
Now that I look back and realize what a monster she has been, I realize that I cannot live like that anymore. I've started moving on. It'll be quite the journey I'm sure, but have to do it whether I want to or not. To tell the truth, the relief has been great. The excitement is really intoxicating...
Sorry to hijack the thread. How are you mindfull?
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
