Bunny,
You are blessed with such a Mom and with a daughter with such a mature, selfless head on her shoulders.
(Of course d17 is blessed with a great Mom, too.) wink

And I'm with you on the smugness.

Also, iwantittowork is dead on. Beware of stbx using his dismissive, demeaning, manipulative, insidious ways on his daughter just as he did to you. There's a real potential for harm, here.

Gardener

"My soul, be satisfied with flowers,
With fruit, with weeds even; but gather them
In the one garden you may call your own."
Cyrano deBergerac