my friend addie, it breaks my heart to read all the bitterness and resentment (correct me if I am wrong) you feel. Not saying that you are overreacting, hell no, but please keep in mind you father's death may be making everything too "dry" for you right now. Too cynical.
As far as H is concerned. I would talk to him openly at this phase. Ig you consider R your lact chance, make it clear to him how important it is for you. Also, the fact he was goig back and forth between you and OW, IMO, meant he was still detaching. It took my H a full year and he probably still needs some time to break completely free from the addiction. Your H was rejected by her, that makes it more difficult. I am not making excuses for him, just stating what I have read over and over again. Take care of you soul, hugs K
