Allen, you have described my H to a tee. All of these years that we have been together and I never saw how H was like a bully in our relationship. He has bullied me emotionally and has done a number on my confidance and I never realized it. H has never put me down or called me names but I see now that there is more than one form of emotional abuse. H has started to distance himself even more from me. We have not talked since he left except for him calling about a tax form that I needed. The conversation did not consist of anything else and H hurried up off of the phone.
I don't know if I should feel this way but his distancing is making me mad inside. Who does he think he is? Everytime I check his facebook status, he has some bacheloresque message stating "I feel like going out tonite, any suggestions? or "I just washed my car and now I am going to see what I can get into." Like he has no responsibilities and is as free as a bird.
I would like to send H that stand up letter tonight or tomorrow through e-mail. I might as well get ready for him getting mad but, like you said, I am just going to ignore it and try not let it bother me because he is used to me backing down from him. He thinks his silence toward me is supposed to make me keep my mouth shut and just accept his decision about deserting our marriage. I know this might sound trival but sending this e-mail is a big step for me. I am going outside of my comfort zone.
ALJ, it is good to hear your confidence come back. Fighting an affair does offer that benefit.
Concerns :
1. Legal concerns re child support 2. Legal concerns re visitation rights
If you haven't looked into this at all before you send this email you may want to do that.
If you to challenge your H you need to know your legal position HE likely does NOT know his. You need to know how far you can push him and what he can potentially do as a reaction.
I would reccomend you speak with a lawyer before sending the email.
