I find your post confusing. I assume that everything after the first sentence is a quote from FIL. My interpretation is that he finds the list depressing because he never broke through from misery to Awakening. He doesn't see how people can break through. He recognizes that you are in Misery. After that he is telling you what he heard from your H -- you are H are friends , he is convinced it is over. His recommendation is that you give H a dose of reality. He uses the word awakening but not in the same way that it is used in the list above. He thinks that if you drop the rope, as they say around here, you will have your best chance of H returning.
I don't think he has given up on you. I think he hears your H saying that his mind is made up. And he is relaying it back to you. He doesn't believe that he or MIL can change H's mind. He thinks the best chance is for H to wake up to the reality that you do make his life better.
