embracing change

[flowmom]

Gnosis thinks that H is done with our M, but he's not pushing for D so that I have time to "get on my feet" (and possibly to establish a precedent for joint custody, which is 40% of the time). Then once I'm on my feet H will be able to cut the cord guilt-free. Gno thinks I should try the route of doing the coparenting plan with the psychologist who may be able to do covert MC. He figures I don't have anything to lose. There is some risk because the coparenting plan will involve some D talk and making that scenario more real.

I think he's probably right.

There is a more optimistic scenario. He may be giving himself a set amount of time to "figure things out", possibly with the encouragement of his mother. At one point she was a WAW for good reason, separated from H's father, then they reconciled after he did some 180s (this was after H moved out of home). H is planning a 10 day trip to Switzerland with his mother at the end of August. She is likely paying for the trip and it could be his designated time to "figure things out" and make a final decision. I think she is pro-reconciliation and in our very brief conversations she has encouraged me to give him time and not take any action. She has been supportive of my past efforts to work on our M and has also been worried about H's well being (depression, health, etc.). She would not want to appear to be "on my side" in this sitch so she is very cagey in our conversations.

If there is an OW, I don't think "V" is it. My sister agrees that she doesn't really fit the bill for what he's likely looking for right now. Of course this is all speculation.