FM, her last email asking me to pick up DD's stuff from school for the weekend seemed a bit like chit-chat. I don't think she had to say any of it. Her last sentence thanking me and wishing us a good weekend with the exclamation point was a bit of friendly gesture...I think(?).
Should I ignore that email or say 'thanks for reminding me because I forget sometimes'? Why'd she write it? Is she feeling guilty? Is she anticipating a long lonely weekend for herself? is she trying to gauge how I'm doing? is she starting a conversation so she knows our whereabouts for the weekend?
First of all, I like the b-day email you crafted. Hmmm, I recognize some familiar wording in there On this- my 2 cents. Let her extend herself way more before you do any kind of in-kind response. Let her hang out there- it's not being rude, you're just busy. Do not respond, esp with a "b/c I usually forget it" kind of thing. Remember (if you still want to follow) the book says to be suspicious and not leap to respond when your spouse shows a step towards you. You'll never know why she said it- it could mean something or nothing. Remember, I'm trying to be cheerful and breezy with my H and sometimes I feel it a little for real and sometimes it's covering up misery- so you don't know. Don't rack your brains trying to figure it out- she doesn't deserve that much of your mind-time right now.
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At what point should there be any 'friendly chit-chat' or a friendly response from me? I'm not good at this but something tells me that I should ignore her last email for now and stay dark until towards the end of the weekend and then offer the b-day idea.
My gut tells me you should do just that--
I hope you have a great weekend with DD!
When the men on the chessboard Get up and tell you where to go; And you've just had some kind of mushroom And your mind is moving slow; Go ask Alice... I think she'll know.
On this- my 2 cents. Let her extend herself way more before you do any kind of in-kind response. Let her hang out there- it's not being rude, you're just busy. Do not respond, esp with a "b/c I usually forget it" kind of thing. Remember (if you still want to follow) the book says to be suspicious and not leap to respond when your spouse shows a step towards you. You'll never know why she said it- it could mean something or nothing. Remember, I'm trying to be cheerful and breezy with my H and sometimes I feel it a little for real and sometimes it's covering up misery- so you don't know. Don't rack your brains trying to figure it out- she doesn't deserve that much of your mind-time right now.
