For those who do still care or want it to work always keep a glimmer of hope. All of my friends did have a time when their WAW did want to work on the marriage again, but by that time they were done.
Hey tjack,
Trying not to get my hopes up but what was the length of time before the WAW came back and said they wanted to work on the marriage? I know every sitch is different but with 3 different people maybe it would give me a better estimate to shoot for. Were any of these D before WAW wanted to work on M or were they just S?
Thanks
Me48 WAW46 M24 yrs S24 D21 D19 EA disc 6/09 2nd EA Fall 09 I move out 11/12/09 W and I switch 1/14/10 D Filed 3/17/10 W moves in with OM 6/8/10 D Final 6/21/10
1st one after 6 month affair they were seperated. they tried to reconcile but no one had changed so it didn't work out. 2nd one divorced after 3 months, then she was asking to see if they could work on it it 3 months later, but he was so repulsed by her actions he said no way. last one has had a 6 month affair, broke it up and she starting begging for him back once he had moved on. She has been wanting to work it out for the past couple months and he is undecided at the time being.
Went to drop off my kids blanket at W rental. I give her a call and find out she is at MIL and tells me to come over and eat. I say I can't stay long. I play with kids, help FIL put dock in and have a good time for 1/2 hr. Then I jet quick saying I have stuff to do. Me and W get a long really good lately. no fighting just normal conversation and act really calm around each other. It doesn't seem normal to want to get divorced if we act this way around each other now. She has changed, I have changed. But I guess she is madly in love with her new BF and I just don't think she could ever see me as anything besides a good dad anymore.
Had a great day yesterday. I went to a local 4 wheeler bar hop event yesterday. On the 3rd bar in rolled a tour bus from a college filled with sorority girls. I took one on a four wheeler ride for an hour and she was really enjoying herself (wink wink). Later than night 1:30 a.m i get woken up by some girls i know that want to come over and hang out for a while. i let them come over and we talk and hang out till 3. Definite interest from them as well. I am really beginning to enjoy this single life. All is not bad in a divorce. For those suffering, learn to really heal yourself, by yourself. Become truly happy being alone and then go find others to share it with!!
Another great day to be alive. Went to meet with L to gather some more info on D. Leaned my rights and what to possibly expect in settlement. I advise all that haven't at least had a consult with a Lawyer to do so. Just knowing helps you to be so much calmer.
talking to my buddy who is going through the same situation. His wife wants him back and has ended her affair and did NC with Om. my friend needs more time to see if he really wants to try and make it work again. They had a fight last night and after that she called her OM for the first time in 1 month and talked for an hr. He is pissed and wants their contact done. I said exposure to OM W might be what you need to extinguish their flame. She is making threats to do some really dirty things if he does expose. Any thoughts? I told him do it, they are the ones that made the poor choices, but I wanted to run it by the experts first.
talked to my buddy again. I told him he should wait a couple weeks (he has access to her phone records), let the dust settle and see if she continues to contact him. She is looking for a promotion at work and she knows if om w is filled in, they both would be in hot water. Currently my friend is not liking the idea of reconciling. If someone else has other thoughts on the exposure please chime in.
W calls me today, very angry. Says are you dating someone or screwing someone? I say why? Well, she was going through the nightstand and found some condoms. I told her that she isn't my mother and I don't have to check in with her everytime I want to have sex. I said we owe it to each other to let each other know when we will be introducing new people into the kids lives so we can monitor how they react to it. Otherwise, none of our business. This is the same person who just wrote about how another guy talks to her soul and that she plans on giving the best of her to him for the rest of her life? WTF double standard anyone?
Your friend has to break that affair by talking to OM W. He does not talk to her on the phone, its an emergency and he talks with her calmly in a safe location to present the information at hand.
