[quote=Onthemountaintop] 6. I need her support, not judgement by removing the threats while keeping reasonable expectations. This means giving me trust, even though I don't deserve it. This has to be a 2 way street...
Easier said than done, but I agree. Thanks. I know I should not ever blame her, but I know myself well enough to know I will. Also, the book about this issue made the same statement, so maybe it is something about addictions. Geez. I sound like a crack addict!
The 6 months seems like it is so long for a timeline. To think that 6 mo from now she may say, "I've tried but I can't live with your sin" and ask for a D is painful. If she is certain as she is now about leaving in a month or two, I don't think 6 months will change much.
Vulnerable is a word that applies to both me and my M. I have told her that if she keeps on melting down and asking for a D, I will eventually accept it and do it. Not in anger but accepting that after 7 months, my growth in love, changes and acceptances, dealing with old issues is a lot. If I'm still not enough, I likely won't be. The only rollercoaster I like is in West Edmonton Mall.
