here I am and thankful the pants traveled!

[Babygirl]

Ok so I have stayed away from here for quite a while. In fact away from almost every person assosiated with the boards, not because I dont love and miss my friends, or worry about what was going on with your lives, but because it was time for baby girl to save baby girl.

When he walked out the door that time in Feb....well, I had given so much to him and saving us, the DBing, the love daring, it literally almost killed me. I actually beleive now people can die of broken hearts. I developed horrible heart problems.....and realized I could literally die at any moment. what was I gonna choose? So I backed away from here, needing to find myself, in a way that was just mine. I realized I had to just let him go........I survived seeing them, I survived them moving to my town.....I slowly got up and started to live, do things........and had I come here, I was afraid that I would be encouraged to keep on the keep on with him, instead of good by and good ridance.....I totally respect everyone here, and realize DB is wonderful, it was just time to close my time of trying to save our marriage. I couldnt go back down most of the DB thinking.....I had to go to live and survive and take care of my kids, and I did everything i could to make us work, it was ok for me to quit thinking.
so I would love to be here.....back with my friends, getting advice, giving advice........but I cant stay if I am going to get bashed for not continuing to fight for that man and our marriage any more.

miss you all so much! will have to fill you in on things, once I know I can be accepted back here under my terms!!
Hugs