So either way, I want to work to rid myself of my need to control and fully realize that I can only control myself. Then work on things with her from a much better place than I am at now. Whether she will be in a better place to work with me on them, I don't know. If she is in MLC, probably not. If she is having an affair, probably not, but those are two big "if's" that I am not at all prepared to accept right now.
OK, but your not being prepared to accept those realities don't make them any less applicable if they're really going on.
As I've said many times on the Infidelity and Newcomers forums, I have personally never seen the "Little Bo-Peep" method work -- you know, "leave them alone, and they'll come home," etc. Doesn't mean it doesn't -- I've just personally never seen it. But "Big Bird" (head in the sand) NEVER works, of that I am certain.
"Sometimes I'm paranoid because people really are against me." (Anonymous)
