Faith without works... (my new thread)

[james217]

I have to listen to my WAW too right and 180 some things?

So now she's more open she's confiding she wants to try to trust again and I should go dark? how does that fix it?

H i'm want to go to MC and us talk work on R.

NOooooooooooooooooo! let's go dark.

So after you find out your wife has been with several other men and you get herpes from her, one day of half decent behavior from her and you trust her already? It didn't take much and if you believe that she's ready to change you're gullible. If it's that easy for her to get your attention and get you wanting her again, she knows she has you wrapped around her finger and guess what, you should expect a repeat of her crap behavior - she didn't have to work for your trust or affection, you gave it up easily and she'll expect you to do the same thing over & over again when she screws up. She didn't confide anything, she told you what you wanted to hear or more accurately, you heard only what you wanted to hear. She has to trust you? Did you have the affairs? Did you give her herpes or did she give it to you? She turned all of this around on you and makes you think that you have to work to earn her trust and you wonder why we're fed up with you?!

You think your situation is so unique among hundreds & thousands of situations in these forums?

That's why I said good luck to you,
since you won't listen and you continue to do your own thing, it doesn't really matter what advice I give or anyone else for that matter - you won't listen, you'll only do what you FEEL like doing. So why should anyone waste their time providing you advice on your situation? It's not worth it, I speak for myself, no one else.

So again, good luck, I hope whatever you do works out for you.

been with one guy. chatted with others in eas. Nope I don't totally trust her.

I'm not an idiot. I'll take it one day at a time. Oh she has to work. She knows what I won't stand for.

If that was the case I'd be making plans right now to move out go back home and be there with her. I'm not.

I'm just happy for a little progress.

I'm not perfect dude. I almost had two PAs myself. The fact that nothing happened is not the point. The fact that I let it get to that point hurt her and affected her trust in me as well.

Yep I have to earn her trust too. I have an anger problem. I know I do. So that's why the out in public contact while I deal with it in counseling.

I was extremely verbally abusive to her because of my own family and that's how we deal with things. She's not. It's destroyed her self esteem and I can admit it.

Ill see how the MC goes (if she shows up) Ill see how her behaviour is.

Today was a good day. Tommorrow could be awful. But it could not. So I'll just deal with tommorrow when it gets here.

I also know I have alot of things I have to fix before I can even call myself trying to be a leader for my family again.

I need to work. I need to deal with my anger probs and healt issues. . I need to be more active in the kids lives. I need to do the stuff I was doing before I got too comfortable got depressed, started feeling sorry for myself and probably treated my wife like my slave instead of my companion.

I did alot of messed up stuff in this relationship. It's not like I was Wally Cleaver and she was this awful woman.

I have to own up to that and face it. I helped make this bed too.