The OW could be present from anger right on through withdrawl…or not…
Forget the stages…
I say that in terms of trying to see how long this might continue…
Or guessing where he is…
Many of us could give you an idea of where he may be, but that is today and could change tomorrow…
There are estimates, there are timelines, but the reality is that there are no real ways to guage this. It depends on him, his issues, you and your issues…
Right now your biggest issue is OW.
So what is it that you are angry about?
Is it the actual affair, the lies, because she was your friend, because you don’t know if it is over, or the fact that he gets upset when you talk about it?
Of course he gets upset when you talk about it, because he feels that you will always hold it over his head. You are making him wear his sin like a big red A in the Scarlett Letter.
Affairs are not easy to get over. You have to decide if you can let it go…before you do much else…
Acting “as if” doesn’t work in this case, I think you have already learned that.
If you can’t, all of the DBing in the world is not going to help. If you can, we are all here to support you.
"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation. It means understanding that something is what it is and there's got to be a way through it."--Michael J. Fox
