There is nothing I have said that is dishonest and nothing that I have done that I am ashamed of. The only thing I wonder if I should tell H about is that FIL changed locks on apt. I wasn't going to tell him b/c I wanted him to go there with OW and find out on his own, cause a little strife... but now that she's probably not going there with him, it may be kinder to tell him that the "picnic palace" has been closed for good.
Well, it depends. You said the apt's are in your name not his. Is there ANY PRACTICAL reason he would have to need that information?
If you two had prior arrangements for example to have him visit there every so often to get the mail or to secure the place or whatever, then maybe, but if you managed the aprt and he had no involvement on his OWN other than YOU asking him to do work over there then NO.
The only information you NEED to share with your partner is what THEY have a NEED and RIGHT to know.
I don't believe in keeping secrets, but I don't tell my wife what I had for lunch at work each day... its nothing she's concerned about. If she DID ask me I would happily tell her.
If there is no practical reason why he would need that information and you aren't trying to do any DAMAGE to your marriage by withholding that information tehn leave it. He doens't need to know that anymore than my wife needing to know how many times I blew my nose today.
I don't see him as having any NEED to KNOW that his affair hideout is now locked up on him. That isn't something he needs or has a right to know about. And I certainly don't think you are trying to DAMAGE your MARRIAGE by not telling him this.
And if he HAS NO NEED TO GO THERE and he DOES one day challenge you on it you can hit him with this :
"OK, so what the HELL are YOU donig going thre in the FIRST PLACE?"
