You're not in the wrong here. Sometimes we say speaking to the WAS is like talking to an "alien". Whats funny is that from the conversation you described, she's out with OM and wants you to do all the changing. Not fair at all is it?
I'd continue what you've been doing, obviously don't get into another conversation this deep. It will not make any sense at all.
Take care of yourself, find activities outside of the house that you like to do. Going to the gym will help your mood out, and keep you from getting depressed. Be seen by the opposite sex.
We all know where you are at, and it sucks. I don't like that you want to openly discuss with her, and she believes that you needed to change.
It sounded like you where always a fair and loving guy to her from your discussions. Some ladies don't deserve men like that anyway, they should not be enabled.
Right now this affair is like a drug to her, cocaine to be exact. She has her love nest, and strong and virtuous security from you. Why change any thing?
Take care of yourself, and your story is an inspiration to all of us.
