"Affair bursting" was destroying the affair. Your not going to talk to your wife to do this.
There were several ways to do it, and I detailed in another post, but I will be kind enough to do it for you again here:
1. If you can prove that OM viewed wife as just a "piece of ass". Perhaps it will be enough to get her to leave. You would get email, pictures, letters, voice recorded, testimonies for others that show thats how he looked at it.
2. If OM has a GF or Wife of his own. Calmly collect all your information, voice recordings, email, phone records, hotel reciepts, etc. Plan to meet GF or Wife in person. The purpose is not retribution, but to ensure there is not another fool out there. What I found in my studies, a large majority of cases where the GF or Wife finds out, she will put hell onto the OM and he will drop off the wife. We had one case on DB where the wife knew of the relationship and permitted it, LOL. This is not the norm.
3. If OM is part of any government agencies or law enforcement. I found that many times the FBI would be willing to intervene. Usually where there are affairs there are dirt, it could prompt an investigation which would put enough heat into the situation. Its the same way, provide your diligently collected info, and if there is some "dirt" that OM is adding to the picture, provide it.
4. If Affair is in the workplace. Most companies have ethical laws which prevent in the office romances. Its the same way. Take your diligently collected information which includes email, pictures, hotel reciepts, voice recordings, etc, etc provide it to HR and the boss over the OM. This will prompt an investigation which is going to cause something to happen.
5. In the case of law enforcement. Some departments don't want affairs as part of their image. Provide your diligently collected information to internal affairs or the department, and they will prompt an investigation which will cause something to happen.
6. The information could also be provided to OM's family. Some families do not want affairs as part of them
Its not easy, but it feels alot better if you can do something about it, even if you don't get your wife back.
