Facebook messages between them that they copied me on.
Hi H, Pass contacted us tonight by phone and requested that you and I no longer have contact, and both OWH and OW agree with her. I did tell her that as long as you initiate emails to me, I will reply. I told her to tell you to stop emailing me. So let's both decide right now not to email one another anymore. She recommended a book called Not Just Friends so maybe it'll be a good read for OWH & me, as well as the Divorce Remedy book she gave us (thanks Pass). It actually isn't fair at all to Pass nor OWH for us to be in contact, how does the distraction help the marriages we're already in, and it wouldn't make sense while we are trying to sort out our marriage. This message isn't for "show" for Pass's sake, this is for real. Pass, I didn't mean to bait you on the phone, that wasn't my intention; I just didn't know if your call was just to harrass us, feed my husband with negativity, but I realize that isn't your goal so I apologize for that. We googled PEA, "brain chemicals" "affairs" as you suggested and came up with a few websites to read. It'll help us with OUR own marriage; figuring out how our love evolved & changed since we were first married. We hope you two are able to sort out your feelings as well.
Husband April 8 at 8:13am Reply Hi OW,
This morning Pass told me she called OWH last night to give him the title of a book and you picked up the phone and started a fight with her. She said she hung up and finished what she had to say in a text. She said nothing to me about ceasing contact or any other content of your conversation. She also said she only told me about it because she figured I would hear about it today. Looks like I did.
I will keep this message brief and just say I will not initiate any emails to you and I hope you and OWH can work out your issues.
Good luck and take care,
I'm sorry she felt that way but she is incorrect. She is initiating phone calls & refusing to identify herself when I answer. She was then placed on speakerphone which gives her full opportunity to OPENLY discuss whatever it is she's calling about. We appreciate her help but ultimately we'd rather go to a professional, and we aren't convinced she can "help us" anyway. We will look up the book she suggested.
If she called to ask me (and you) to cease contact, which is a REASONABLE request, wouldn't she WANT to talk to ME (and especially YOU) to request that? I told her to TELL YOU to stop emailing me, so I don't know why she herself hasn't told you to stop, and if she's apparently not discussing hardly anything with you, her own husband, but is contacting US instead, she's obviously working on OUR marriage moreso than YOURS!
As far as her marital issues she needs to talk to YOU, not to OWH or me about them. Calling us & telling us your "addiction to extramarital affairs" & emotional "pattern" when having your "love affairs" is making her/your marital problems OUR business. So when asked about being married to a "serial cheater" coupled with "self respect/sense of self worth," as my response to her, she hung up on me. Oh well. You are the person she SHOULD be communicating with about all this stuff and she is instead calling US, and therefore we suspect she may be doing so NOT with open, honest, forthright intentions. She is welcome to call us anytime she wants if she genuinely wants to help us, we appreciate her suggestions, but wouldn't it be more constructive to have open discussions with YOU instead, her own husband, and you both work out your OWN issues among YOURSELVES, and if she has a problem with anything YOU are doing/not doing, shouldn't she take it up with YOU, instead of US? That would be OUR request.
