....I never understood (or believed until recent years) how a man could want sex less than once a week, if he liked sex at all. It doesn't compute in my way of thinking. It's hard for me to understand why a man would want sex after 8 days, but not after 4 days. Even after just 4 days, the male body is more than fully recharged. How does an additional 4 days build further desire??...
Interesting comment and topic.
Personally, I have a difficult time going without sex for 4 days so I understand what you are talking about. I do believe that different people have different frequency needs and that there can be a trade-off between frequency and quality.
Your comment triggered a thought based on something that I read recently. I am reading a very interesting book at the moment, The Erotic Mind by Jack Morin. It is based on an analysis of questionaires associated with the "peak sexual experience" of thousands of people. It disects both lusty and romantic love and the things that make such erotic experiences even more powerful. Some of the key ingredients that helps spice up an erotic encounter can be desire, anticipation and longing. There are others like taboos or violating prohibitions, searching for power, and overcoming ambivalence.
What I have found from my personal experience is that when my LD wife erotically teases me (arousal but not orgasmic release) when combined with a promise of sex either later that day or the next day. I am screaming hot for the next opportunity. It appears to be a way for her to exchange frequency for intense quality with me.
While not understanding the mind of a LD partner, but trying to listen and understand my wife, there could be someting about the need for regaining space and allowing desire to build in anticipation. Perhaps the use of erotic teasing and anticipation can be a way for both to reach a compromise.
Just a thought.
P.S. As to the articles on why frequent sex is important in health maintenance, I am sold, but I am sure many LD spouses will just bat their eyes at those studies. Thanks for the references anyway.
>43 years of marriage--My wife and I are now closer than we have been in decades. I believe that my SSM is over.
