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kissak Offline OP
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FIB...thank you for reminding me. I am being very careful smile

Things have been going pretty good. I have to say a couple of times I have seem him get aggravated and not tell me why. That bugs me, but I just have to let him handle things on his own.

He has said he loves me a few times, but its not a regular thing. Of course I dont say it unless he does. Sometimes I wonder if I should say it more, but I dont want to pressure him into saying it. Its just a good sign he will say it with out the added "in a way".

But not much else to tell other than things are going good. Ow is out of the pic and has been for quite a while. I think he sees her for truly what she was all along.

Kids are still having some trust issues with him. They often ask if he is coming home or where he is...they often try to get us to say I love you and do things like that. It bothers me some, but I know it will take a while for them too.

I still have a problem with arguing with him. I find sometimes i will avoid an argument with him out of fear. I dont want to make him angry with me or upset...although that fear is fading...not that we argue any, but a few times there have been discussions that I give in....Im working on it.

He is still in therapy, although he has mentioned quitting soon. I dont see the depression as much anymore. Hardly ever really.

well, just an update for you all.

Praying for all of you still.


Kissak

"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3
M-37 H-37
S-10, D-15
M- 1993
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Came and went too MANY times!
Gone again 10-25-10
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Kissak, thanks for the update. I look to your tread to see what may be waiting for me, now that H wants to reconcile. I know that each sitch is different, but it still helps to see what others are going through.

I sure hope that in my sitch it won't take 5 months to let him come back, but we will see....

All the best to you and keep posting smile


M53 H54 D17
M33Y T38Y
Bomb OW 09/09
OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10
WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10
Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
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kissak Offline OP
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Thanks Mila,

I have to say after so much experience in letting my H come back too soon SOOO many times, waiting 5 months was nothing in my case!

I wish the best to you!!


Kissak

"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3
M-37 H-37
S-10, D-15
M- 1993
First bomb- 12/23/06
Came and went too MANY times!
Gone again 10-25-10
Joined: Jun 2005
Posts: 2,144
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Kissak...I have to say I am shocked, impressed, and happy for you...so many times I wondered why you didn't throw in the towel...I guess I should have known that you "knew"...as did I in a way...the hard part is wondering if H "knows"...I am glad to hear that you are doing well and that things are progressing...I would recommend to H to be more reassuring to the kids...let him know they are still insecure with him so he can work on repairing that with them...

Take care...

p.s. update on us...just got back from a Caribbean Cruise for our 30th anniversary! Something I had wanted for our 25th but then we didn't make it together...so have fun on your family vacation this summer!


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Thanks for the update Kissak.....
Praying for you


Me: 46 H:44
Together: 25 years
Married: 20 years
Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07
OW: EA began 2005
PA began end of 2006
3 children,20, 16, 6
ex asked for forgiveness
01/16/11

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kissak Offline OP
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Thanks for the prayers Trusting...

IMLIN...wow a cruise....my H wants to go on one too. But we are planning a vacation with the kids in June...they are all excited that their dad is coming along this time!

I get what your saying though...I guess deep down I always knew...its hard to explain I guess. Sometimes you just know. I guess because of the way my H was the whole time we were separated I kinda figured it werent going to be over unless I said so.


Kissak

"What time I am afraid, I will trust in thee." Psalms 56:3
M-37 H-37
S-10, D-15
M- 1993
First bomb- 12/23/06
Came and went too MANY times!
Gone again 10-25-10
Joined: Feb 2010
Posts: 1,605
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Kissak,

That's interesting

Quote:
I guess deep down I always knew...its hard to explain I guess. Sometimes you just know.


I have the same, always had it, just a gut feeling that we are not done. It was there all the way throughout this ordeal, on my bad days I tried to dismiss it as "wishful thinking", but it's different, it's like knowing deep inside. You are right it's very hard to explain.


M53 H54 D17
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OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10
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I have had that feeling all along as well, but I am still afraid to put too much stock into it yet.


"Endurance is a testament of love."

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I know we usually don't trust what we can't explain. Or maybe we just don't want to jinks it? confused


M53 H54 D17
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Bomb OW 09/09
OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10
WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10
Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
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I've also had that gut feeling that H and I are not done. I really have no reason to feel that way, I just do. I will move forward as if he's not coming back because I don't trust that feeling. I never thought he would leave in the first place.

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