I fully agree that the way passenger's H went about talking to her was wrong, but c'mon - she wasn't giving him a time and place at that point to talk - she had avoided him at lunchtime etc. My gut tells me there is so much more to this- with passenger as well as her H.
And I think NOT catering to his demands is an important step in taking BACK the DIGNITY he TOOK from her when he started cheating. Pass needs to TEACH him how she wants to be treated. Right now he's just doing what he pleases to Pass' detriment.
There is more to it, but until he ASKS for a time from her and shows her respect then forget it. He wasn't even apologizing for cheating when he was offering to talk. Not owning ANYTHING. And he COULD have written what he wanted to say in email... its not like Pass was refusing to read a letter. She just wasn't willing to be cornered in a room with him... its disrespectful to have to do that while your spouse is cheating. I don't see any reason why it is in any way unreasonable to refuse to face to face talk while ownership of an affair and a simple apology has yet to be offered.
"I want to talk" reply = no
"I'm sorry, I made a big mistake here" reply = ok, here's a time I have free.
Originally Posted By: saffie
Again, I agree. But at the same time passenger, remember what you have said about you yelling at him in the past. It might be good for him to know you regret it...Maybe if you admitted that to him it might just take the wind out of his sails - did with my H.
Yes, this opened a window with my wife as well. But right now during the first few days of exposure he's in shock and what he ended up saying and doing wasn't at all surprising.
