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luvless Offline OP
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Maybe he wants to say something (nice, that is), but is stuck in a pattern of meanness that he can't shake. One book I read suggested that the worst thing that you can do to a man is make him ashamed (and for a woman, to make her feel isolated). IF that applies here, maybe he is actually ashamed of what he has done, but is afraid to risk apologizing.

I think you may be on to something here OTMT


M44 H41
M20 T23
3 older teens
Bomb Nov 09 "i'm not happy"
EA Nov 09 w/coworker
Another PA in Mar 10
I Filed Apr 10
D final Dec 10
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Now...if I could just apply what I learn to my own marriage!

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I've been reading all of your comments and have not participated in a while. I am still sleeping in the basement and trying to do things for me. Last night I went out to watch the bb game with friends.

Easter Sunday was not too pleasant. Our kids and W did not want to go to church so I left them and went by myself. I enjoyed the service but missed not having W there for the 1st time in 25 years. It seems we have switched roles the last few months. She has been the one on edge, short with our girls and unhappy. I feel she is very angry that I have flipped and I am on a path back to my oldself. She is very resentful I have not left and made it easy for her to justify her feelings of ILYBNILWY. I have been very dilligent about going dark on the R and M. This morning while we both left for work she asked if we can talk tonight and said Easter wasn't very pleasant. All I said was yes and that going to church by myself wasn't all that pleasant. Do any of you have any points of advice for me tonight? I really don't know what to expect.
Thanks


Me 56
W 47
D17, D15,D15
Married 28years, in divorce 3 yrs
Bomb 8/20/09
Separated 3 yrs
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luvless Offline OP
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Now - keep doing what you're doing...working on you. You don't know what she is going to tell you tonight. Be ready and stand your ground. Stay upbeat. Agree with her if she wants to leave. Tell her she is right and that you deserve better.

Do you have a thread? Stay on one thread so people can follow you.

Luv

Last edited by luvless; 04/06/10 02:28 PM.

M44 H41
M20 T23
3 older teens
Bomb Nov 09 "i'm not happy"
EA Nov 09 w/coworker
Another PA in Mar 10
I Filed Apr 10
D final Dec 10
Joined: Mar 2010
Posts: 444
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Looks like his threads are:

#1

#2

Yes, keep your same thread and add it to your signature so we can all references it quickly smile


When the men on the chessboard
Get up and tell you where to go;
And you've just had some kind of mushroom
And your mind is moving slow;
Go ask Alice...
I think she'll know.
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I'm more of a typewriter guy than a computer guy. How do I add my thread to my signature?


Me 56
W 47
D17, D15,D15
Married 28years, in divorce 3 yrs
Bomb 8/20/09
Separated 3 yrs
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 80
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OK...if W wants to walk do I stay in agreement with sharing the family busing, etc? Or do I say I understand I'll see the girls Wed. night and on Sunday?


Me 56
W 47
D17, D15,D15
Married 28years, in divorce 3 yrs
Bomb 8/20/09
Separated 3 yrs
Joined: Jan 2010
Posts: 1,098
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Nowawake.

Click on this for your old thread (Courtesy of Juno). NowAwakes Current Thread - Click Here

1. The link above is your thread! On the bottom of the thread, there is the quick reply part you can add your situation updates and questions. Keeping each person's thread separate helps so we don't mix other's issues with yours and suggest something unhelpful.

2. To help you out, I would suggest you click on "My Stuff" near the top of the page.

3. Then, click on "preferences" and make sure they are all "yes". If you've done this, your replies will come to your email inbox.

4. Finally, click on "My Stuff" again, and then click on "profile"

5. At the bottom of the profile, you can add your signature. The signature tells others a bit about you and your situation so you don't have to remind anyone.

I hope this helps.

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luvless Offline OP
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Hi guys...

I've been reading up on the Law of Detachment and I'm trying to finally just let go. I'm not 100% there yet but I'm working on it.

I had a very busy day yesterday so today I'm gonna take it easy. I think I have found my L. He is young but smart and seems like he actually cares about his clients. I have to make a decision...the clock is ticking.

Luv


M44 H41
M20 T23
3 older teens
Bomb Nov 09 "i'm not happy"
EA Nov 09 w/coworker
Another PA in Mar 10
I Filed Apr 10
D final Dec 10
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Posts: 2,372
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Hey Luv, it's been a long time.

Originally Posted By: luvless
He gets mad and starts talking about how I got nothin on him (that he's not doing anything) starts telling me "you need to move out" and other spew.


Why is he telling you to move out? Is this something he's said before?

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