Need a Plan for My Marriage

[LSG]

Steve,

You are right I am "down on my luck." I am doing something about as I explain in my post to "sandie2."

She put on there OM and W name that they are together since 2009, and a plan for a day. This seems to be her fantasy, but it is in Japanese, and my Japanese is not that great. I do find it odd that she has made him her boyfriend already, and we are still married. He is such scum to me. I don't know how the both of them can cheat on their families. I need to expose the both of them soon.

My luck goes from bad to worse everyday.

My kids are my only focus and not losing them.

I interviewed for a job and it went pretty well I think. I prepared a lot.

[Steve McQueen]

Honestly, I really don't have a plan at this point. I am just trying to get by day by day.

What should be my next step?

come up with a plan and a back up plan.

your wife has as plan and a back up plan.
I got a plan and a back up plan.
honestly, i've got a 100 schemes and dreams going on. they dont all work out, and they shouldnt. but that doesnt keep me from trying, jaws.

you need a plan and a back up plan that doesnt sound like: "my plan is to get my wife back"

are you in the states? was your wife born in the states?

[LSG]

Hi Steve,

I always working on a backup plan, but I don't like any of them very much. It does not achieve the goal that I set out for myself of staying married.

I will use these plans if I have to as a last resort.

My wife is Japanese, and we currently live in the states.

[LSG]

I had a great day with the kids at the park. I was not tired, and I actually enjoyed being out for the first time since this whole ordeal started. I found piece for about 2 hours and had a great time. They had a blast and enjoyed being with me. I was in a good mood when my wife came home too. Not that she cared in any way, but I felt great. I am going to be working part time for the census. I think it will be good for me. It will also show the court that I am doing my best to work if this stitch goes to court. I am very happy about that. I also hope to have good news on my other interview. I am a little concerned about one of the programs, but I was very prepared and ready to answer all questions. It was a good feeling. I believe that my wife with go ahead with the D, but I will continue to work on the M and let her worry about that until I am served.

I hope for a better tomorrow!

[LSG]

Everyone,

My W told me that she wants to go to mediation for a divorce. Any ideas on how to stop the upcoming divorce? I need help. I do not want D, and I understand no one does. I need to do what is best for me and staying M to my W is best for me and my family.

Please give any ideas that I have not thought of. I need them spelled out for what works to help end her relationship with the OM at work. I still do not have information about the OMW.

I am not panicked, well maybe a little. It is just time is a major factor and counting down to the big D.

It is seeming inevitable!

[LSG]

It feels like I running out of time in my marriage. I don't know what I am able to do to change the outcome. It seems that I am unable to change anything at the moment. She is so attached to this OM to see that we could work out our own marriage problems if it was just between her and me. I guess that is the way it is.

She still comes home late, and I am sure it is because of him and our current stitch.

I just hate the way things are going for us.

I hope it will somehow work out, but my optimism wanes more everyday.

[DaddyLongShanks]

Is "Affair bursting" a possibility here. It usually leaves the WAS with a stinging feeling, as they are dumped out on their own.

Hang tight and weigh your options.

[LSG]

Hi Daddylongshanks,

Thanks for your kind words. I need them now.

What is "affair bursting?" I guess you is it a possibility with it end. I do not know whether it will or not. I wish it would, but I think it will be too late then. She is seriously considering mediation. I do have a little time before divorce, but I know it is coming soon. I just feel it.

I have been hanging in there, but today is not one of my better ones. Yesterday was great.

There is always hope I guess.

[DaddyLongShanks]

"Affair bursting" was destroying the affair. Your not going to talk to your wife to do this.

There were several ways to do it, and I detailed in another post, but I will be kind enough to do it for you again here:

1. If you can prove that OM viewed wife as just a "piece of ass". Perhaps it will be enough to get her to leave. You would get email, pictures, letters, voice recorded, testimonies for others that show thats how he looked at it.

2. If OM has a GF or Wife of his own. Calmly collect all your information, voice recordings, email, phone records, hotel reciepts, etc. Plan to meet GF or Wife in person. The purpose is not retribution, but to ensure there is not another fool out there. What I found in my studies, a large majority of cases where the GF or Wife finds out, she will put hell onto the OM and he will drop off the wife. We had one case on DB where the wife knew of the relationship and permitted it, LOL. This is not the norm.

3. If OM is part of any government agencies or law enforcement. I found that many times the FBI would be willing to intervene. Usually where there are affairs there are dirt, it could prompt an investigation which would put enough heat into the situation. Its the same way, provide your diligently collected info, and if there is some "dirt" that OM is adding to the picture, provide it.

4. If Affair is in the workplace. Most companies have ethical laws which prevent in the office romances. Its the same way. Take your diligently collected information which includes email, pictures, hotel reciepts, voice recordings, etc, etc provide it to HR and the boss over the OM. This will prompt an investigation which is going to cause something to happen.

5. In the case of law enforcement. Some departments don't want affairs as part of their image. Provide your diligently collected information to internal affairs or the department, and they will prompt an investigation which will cause something to happen.

6. The information could also be provided to OM's family. Some families do not want affairs as part of them

Its not easy, but it feels alot better if you can do something about it, even if you don't get your wife back.

[LSG]

I hope to expose OM to his W, but I am waiting on the information. I will cancel the money order and reissue it.