I just finshed reading through the past 5 pages and I am so sorry my friend.
I am sorry it didn't turn out the way you wanted however I want you to look at yourself in the mirror and truly see the reflection...You did the best you could with what was on your plate.
I don't post much anymore because quite frankly I am a bit disturbed at the turn the board has taken...More about kissing a$$ and being a doormat in each forum then about focusing on becoming a better person...
It took me 14 months to realize I was worth so much more then a crappy spouse who cheated on me...
Fear held me back...I was willing to keep my H around because I feared the unknown and I see so many people here doing that, that it infuriates me...
People willing to accept teeny tiny crumbs in the hopes that maybe just maybe their marriage will survive - What they don't realize is that is just the beginning...
Piecing if you are lucky is hard work and a lot of the people here haven't even begun to scratch the surface as to why all this happened in the first place. (and no I am not buying into the MLC, PTSD, OCD, PMS, Alcoholic, Drug Addict, Bi-Polar etc... - These are all excuses for extremely bad behavior - Every one of these spouses has full mental capacity therefore able to make rationale decisions) ...
I see so very few people actually make it and I am starting to see a lot of "newcomers" who have been here before - That speaks volumes to me...
You deserve better my friend - we all do and I will keep you and your children in my prayers.
