Yes, she would have seen that talk as trying to get her back, especially if you do it from a firehose. Small, baby steps is the way to do that.
You will have opporunities! Think about it. You and your wife can dream about what your kids will be. She may say something terse, but you can run with it.
For instance, if she is dreaming about what her kids might experience growing up, listen for her to say something like "Because I never got to do that". If she says something like that, she is dreaming through your kids. Take that kind of conversation and run with it! Since they are both your kids, what if you had the opportunity to experience it all together, whatever it is.
Get yourself in a financial position to make it happen!
